The minotaurs of Magic the Gathering – one of the most forgotten tribes to have ever been placed at the mercy of Magic research & design. Why so, you ask? As a long time fan of Magic minotaurs (known in my circle as “cows”), I have watched closely through the years the lack of evolution that has taken place among the great bovines. Well, perhaps lack of evolution isn’t the right choice of words – let’s just call it neglect. There have been some bright spots in the history of Magic’s minotaurs, for sure (those will be seen below), but reality is a cruel harsh hag. The single most notable happening within the cow heard in the last couple years has been the usurpation of a long and tall standing Magic mainstay named Hill Giant. Replaced by a card that I feel has tragically come to epitomize the sad state of affairs for what will be, for better or worse, one of my favorite creature types till duels do us part. Poor, poor Canyon Minotaur.
In some ways this is an appeal to Magic Research & Design – free these beasts from the creative shackles you have cruelly placed upon them! It’s about time a competitive cow tribe arose, don’t you think?
10. Anaba Spirit Crafter
Although another Magic minotaur actually can claim ownership to the word “lord” in his name, the Anaba Spirit Crafter is in reality the closest thing the cows have to a lord type creature. Note: he’s not a real lord, because to be that, he would need to also give other minotaurs a +1 toughness bonus and some kind of keyword ability or type-wide effect. Sadly, Anaba Spirit Crafter doesn’t do these things, but at least he gives other minotaurs some kind of bonus, which is more than can be said for any other cow. Although this is true, I know from experience that the Spirit Crafter does little to make opponent’s tremble like other lords do. In fact, he is the only tribal lordesque creature I know of that, when six creatures of the same type are on the table top, is the last one to eat an opponent’s Doom Blade. I’m not sure what hurts him more, a Doom Blade or the implicit statement of suck that comes from Labyrinth Minotaur getting removed before you. I guess if nothing else, he’s a survivor.